Step Nine can leave you emotionally exhausted; it’s a difficult step to navigate. But the rewards you’ll reap from living amends can help make the challenges easier and more productive. The origin of living amends in modern use relates what is Oxford House to addiction recovery and substance abuse treatment. However, in the context of grief recovery, David Kessler, in his book Finding Meaning, talks about the importance of living amends as a tool for grief healing. In particular, he discusses how to heal when the person we need to make amends with is no longer living. When the person you owe reparations to has died, you can still make living amends by changing things about you and how you live your life.
Apologizing for the Way You Behaved
No doubt you will experience challenges and setbacks along the way. But by prioritizing your recovery on a daily basis and doing whatever that next right thing might be for you, you will keep moving forward in living a life of good purpose. We can also make amends by living very purposefully within the bounds of our principles.
Types of Amends in AA
On the other hand, if you take the indirect approach, you focus on changing your behaviors and allow these changes to demonstrate your efforts. Secondly, sobriety helps minimize the risk of reverting to old behaviors. Emotionally charged situations arise when addressing past mistakes, and being sober equips individuals with better coping mechanisms to navigate these feelings. Addressing co-occurring mental health issues alongside maintaining sobriety via dual diagnosis treatment is also helpful to this end. Direct amends involve making direct restitution or apologies to those who have been harmed. This can take the form of face-to-face conversations, written apologies, or other forms of direct communication.
Relationship Journal Prompt Download
Many people find that the support they receive from AA meetings helps them prepare to make amends. Talking with your sober community about your history with drugs or alcohol can help you identify what you need to make amends for. Every month, 150,000 people search for addiction or mental health treatment on Recovery.com.
Addressing substance use disorder during the recovery process is crucial, as it involves acknowledging past harms and making efforts to rebuild family connections. The 9th Step is a crucial and transformative part of the recovery journey in Alcoholics Anonymous. It requires more than just a simple apology; it involves taking concrete actions to rectify past wrongs and demonstrating a commitment to change. In addiction recovery, this process is not just about saying “I’m sorry.” It is a commitment to making things right and fostering healing for the individual and others.
- Individuals living with addiction often push their loved ones away, which can cause significant harm to their relationships.
- With their extensive knowledge and empathetic approach, clients receive the support and expertise needed to navigate the challenges of addiction.
- It’s essential to recognize that making amends is not merely about saying “I’m sorry.” It involves taking responsibility for past actions and demonstrating a genuine desire to change.
- Today, I know my words have value whether they pay attention or not.
- Taking action is what truly counts in the journey of recovery.
How Making Amends Helps You
- My Mom, on the other hand, loves to complain about Ricky’s behavior.
- For example, when you were addicted, you likely apologized to family and friends quite a bit, but that doesn’t mean you changed your behavior.
- Recovery.com combines independent research with expert guidance on addiction and mental health treatment.
- I have a responsibility to parent him and speak out for his best interests.
- It’s important to note that making amends is for the person we hurt.
We come to understand that we are good people with a bad disease. Steps 8 and 9 help us to move out of the shame we have lived in, shame that feeds the cycle of substance use and addiction. We strengthen and reinforce healthy recovery whenever we do our part to repair relationships or reach out to living amends others with support and understanding. No matter how much we feel the need to make things right, forcing another to meet with us or hear from us is not part of the Steps. It’s also important to take great care when making amends to someone who is in active addiction because our primary responsibility is to safeguard our own health and recovery from substance abuse.
Beaches Recovery is a 90-bed addiction treatment center located on the beautiful beaches of Jacksonville, Florida. Each program is designed to exceed industry standards and provide the highest quality care. In cases involving abuse, whether emotional, physical, or sexual, reaching out to apologize can be harmful and counterproductive. If you’re a treatment provider and have a question, please reach out and someone from our Customer Success team will be in touch with you shortly.
